Why Should You Consider Mediation When Getting a Divorce?

Posted in Divorce.

While there are a variety of reasons why mediation is a desirable alternative to a traditional divorce, I believe mediation is an undeniably powerful tool for families ensconced in conflict. Mediation has been used with great success for several decades in settling and resolving family, marital and couple conflicts.

The reason mediation is so effective is because of the cooperative nature of the process. You are called to make decisions jointly, rather than as two opposing parties in a legal battle. You control how your assets are split, and how your children will be cared for. You control the process, rather than having a judge determine your fate. Thus, you will not be subject to court-imposed delays or cross-examinations. The timeline for settling a divorce typically depends on the people, rather than the legal or situational factors surrounding the divorce. An extremely tempestuous couple will often take longer to look past their issues and agree on a settlement.

Conflict is an inevitable part of any divorce; however, an excess of conflict is a warning sign. If disagreements impede the process of a divorce, then couples undoubtedly have unresolved emotional issues that they have not yet dealt with. You should exercise forgiveness as it will help both the pace of the divorce settlement and the timeline for which each person heals after the separation.
Communicating from the heart is a necessary element in the process of mediation. This type of communication is characterized as highly intuitive, holistic and circular, and it will ultimately encourage you to forge meaningful and authentic connections with your spouse that will eliminate internal conflict. When you engage in a “heart-to-heart”, you learn more about what you truly want. Sometimes a person’s desire is not for a divorce, but rather, a change in their marriage. A call for divorce is sometimes a kneejerk reaction to fear and anger surrounding a marriage, and the solution is often a form of counseling, much like the process of mediation.

Thus, mediation goes beyond solving divorce settlements—it makes you look at the origin of your conflict-ridden relationship. Since mediation calls you to look at the source of your separation, you can then recall the emotional journey that led you to seek out a divorce. You can make informed decisions about your relationship with your spouse, minimizing further conflict and encouraging cooperation for the sake of your futures and the well-being of any children involved.

Finally, mediation allows you to look at what is truly at stake in your divorce. Once you determine the origins of your divorce and how you feel about your spouse, divorce, etc., you can open up about ways to facilitate a peaceful resolution. I encourage couples to have heartfelt, self-aware interactions with their partner when navigating through a divorce settlement.

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Sue Gramacy

October 25, 2022.

I recommend Leyla Balakhane for resolving family disputes. She listens carefully, appreciates the emotions and needs that underline each conversation . She is genuinely concerned with the well being of all parties involved. She is very effective. What’s great is she always focuses on the best interest of the children. I have worked with Leyla for over 10 years and have watched her work her magic with families. Sue Gramacy

Stacey Lisk

October 14, 2022.

Leyla Balakhane was one of the supervising mediators that worked with us at Edmund D Edelman Children’s Court. Given that she was one of the top mediators working on unlawful detainer cases, she was referred by a judge who found her to be incredibly gifted in what she does and felt that she would be a great asset in working with families. Leyla has a natural ability to connect with the families and helping them reach agreements that is far above whats required. Given that she was very interested in growing in her practice, she was able to help create a more in-depth and detailed parenting checklist which led to a higher success rate in or mediations at the Children’s Court. Because of Leyla many families have more profound and insightful agreements. I would add supervising mediator

Your RN Attorney Jennifer Johnston Terando

October 12, 2022.

Leyla Balakhane is knowledgable, compassionate, and effective. I highly recommend her as a mediator.

Shsavina TehrNi

October 10, 2022.

Thank you Leyla for helping us finalize a very difficult journey. We are able to have a better coparenting relationship because of everything you taught us. We are both very grateful for helping us resolve all issues in an amicable manner.

Rachel Hsiung

March 17, 2022.

Leyla is professional, patient and wonderful person to work with. She’s a good negotiator and listener to help her clients to get amicable results.

Noah Stern

October 9, 2021.

Layla is a superb mediator. She helped my family through a tough time with ease. I highly recommend Leyla for any family going through a challenging time.

sepideh doust

March 28, 2021.

Leyla Balakhane was my supervising mediator at children's courthouse. She taught me great communication tools to implement in my mediation practice. She helps the family, social worker, attorneys, and others involved in the case facilitate meaningful discussion and resolve the issues sent to mediation. Her level of wisdom is uncanny. She is able to bring awareness for parents to make the best decision for their family. I would highly recommend her as a skilled mediator in the field of family mediation.

Zak Shapiro

January 22, 2021.

Leyla is an exemplary mediator for couples going through a divorce. She has the couples best interest in mind at all times through out the mediation process. She truly supports couples in making the best decision for them, whether its to help work towards reconciliation or agree on divorce terms. She helps couple find creative and collaborative solutions for their division of assets and debts. She is patient and understanding of what both parties are going though, and she carefully and thoughtfully helps to find a solution. I Cannot recommend her enough!

Matthew Khorsandi

September 28, 2020.

Leyla is an incredible mediator with a wealth of knowledge and experience. Most importantly, she genuinely cares for the people she works with. Highly recommend.